Automated Telephone Systems
Argh!!! I just tried calling both Verizon and DirecTv to get some stuff straightened out with my accounts. Like all good netizens, if it’s something I can handle on a web site, I’ll take care of it on the web site. But these were issues that don’t fit any of the cookie cutter categories that are offered on the Web Sites.
- After trying to sign up for the One Bill option with Verizon (Wireless, DSL, Land Line, Satellite TV) they unceremoniously dumped the bundle I had before (everything minus Wireless on the same bill). Last I talked to them they were going to “investigate” what went wrong. So I wanted to make sure they were investigating.
- DirecTV–I love watching the US Men’s National Soccer Team play. Doesn’t really matter when/who they play, if they’re on I wanna watch. They were playing last night and I set the crappy box DirecTV calls a “DVR” to record the game last night so that I could enjoy it when I got home (man how I miss the TiVo based DirecTV box, but alast I’m a sellout of all the new HD channels and put up with their inferior product). When I got home and tried to watch, the box had a recording of 0 minutes labeled “Soccer”. Turns out for some reason, the stupid box thought the game was blacked out for my market. I know Loma Linda is only a 5 hour plane ride or so away from Guatemala where the game was being played, but I’m pretty sure the game wasn’t blacked out in my area. So I needed to complain to someone. Their web site told me to post to some user Forums. The User Forum guys correctly noticed, it was a problem only the retards at DirecTV could deal with. So, I gave them a call too.
What followed next in each case was something that made me want to curse at the top of my lungs at the person that invented this awesome technology that instills rancor in everyone that uses it. But I’m sure it saves the bean counters some money, otherwise they wouldn’t be so heavily deployed. First thing the messages say, “You can visit us on our website”. Well if your website did what I needed, I wouldn’t be calling you in the first place. Then they go ahead and start listing all of the options that are available on the website!!! I mean turn the dagger after you’ve thrusted it into my torso why don’t you. Since I am a person of above average intelligence (the system was obviously designed for those people can’t think for themselves and need life to be a series of multiple choice options), I know that I need to speak to customer support representative in each case. Usually, you can press the “0″ button and go straight to a customer service rep. Both systems repeatedly tried to get me to accept one of their cookie cutter options, since they trained assembly line workers aren’t really geared towards handling stuff that’s out of the ordinary.
Of course, the more often I press “0″ to get to a Customer Service Rep, the more the system chastizes me to choose one of its options. Well, I’m not taking it anymore and hang up… once for each system.
Eventually I call back and get through, but man those automated systems are annoying. Make me wanna reach through the phone line and punch whatever lady is telling me to “press or say 1″ for the 10th time.
Now that I’ve ranted, I feel better.
Peace Out.
